ST. FRANCIS OF ASSISI

by Helen Lewison
(San Francisco, Ca.)

MAGGIE SUGARBUM

I have a cat, a cat that was foisted on me by a very nice lady who had been informed that my long time companion, Finian had passed. I was desolate when Finian died; nineteen years with a cat that filled my life with pleasure and pain. Have you ever been bitten by your cat? Well, that’s another story but here goes.
This very nice lady who I will refer to from now on as N.L. brought her cat, Mary over and gave me some cock-a-mamie story about going on a cruise and would I cat sit. Now I barely knew N.L., having met her only once and even though the cruise was happening, I knew she intended to leave said cat at my door. I said O.K. I observed that the cat looked a lot like the late Finian, which did please me.
I knew Finian liked girls (girl cats) but having been neutered early in his life did dampen his desire. However, he did spend an inordinate amount of time with Molly (a cat) that lived next door. They would both lie on my lower deck only a few feet from each other and every now and then, I saw a wistful look coming from each of them. Having lived with a male, I found myself now living with a girl cat. Since I’ve become a widow, I seem to live in the world of women, so she filled my agenda quite well.
As expected when the N.L. returned from her cruise, she asked if I would like to give Mary a home. Of course, by then we two creatures had bonded and I agreed but said, “I will have to change her name. Mary doesn’t suit her or me, therefore from now on I will call her Maggie”.
Here comes the hard part, the N.L. called and said, “Next week I would like to take “Mary” to be blessed at the church to celebrate St. Francis of Assisi. I took her last year, and it was wonderful. You, of course, can join us.” I have never attended an animal blessing and decided it would be interesting. The N.L. arrived promptly in her car, placing the litter box on the floor in back (a very organized person) and off we went to be blessed. With Maggie in her arms, we entered Grace Cathedral. I’ve never been there. It’s a beautiful fantastic edifice. I was quite impressed.
The N.L. holding Maggie walked over to a man she called Deacon something, obviously one of the holy men in the church and said, “This is Mary, I’m bringing her to be blessed”. He smiled and said, “Fine”. I interrupted and said “Her name is Maggie and she’s Jewish”. He smiled again and said, “No problem, Mary was Jewish” and walked away.
Well, I thought I’ve straightened that out. After the service, row after row of people some with animals, some without approached the holy people. There was a row of them attending their flock. I said, “I’d like to go up, I’ve never seen animal blessings”. The N.L. said, “Sure, come with us”. I followed gingerly up the aisle, stood next to the N.L. who was holding Maggie. She kneeled, ate the wafer and drank the wine as I watched. The holy person in front of me handed me the wafer. I said, “I don’t kneel” not really knowing what to say. She said, “It doesn’t matter”. She was standing wafer in hand, I opened my mouth – dissolved the wafer and when she offered me the wine, I took a sip. “Oh my God, forgive me – I took communion not the (Down on your knees) communion but nonetheless I knew I would be punished. A JEW TAKING COMMUNION!
With the national elections coming up and being a long-established Democrat, I will have to be very circumspect and not offend any force that could diminish the chance of having a democratic president.
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Now for part two, the good part. Again we come to the blessing of the animals – St. Francis of Assissi. Again the N.L. wants to come over and pick up Maggie to be blessed. Well, I said I don’t think I’ll join you this year but at her pleading to take Maggie into the church since she said it really meant so much to her, I weakened. I said “I’ll stay in your apartment across the street and when you return we’ll have lunch and chat.”
She agreed and picked both of us up at my house (Maggie and me), taking me to her apartment while the two of them departed to do the “blessing”. She carefully put Maggie into a large white leather pouch comfortably enclosed in a soft blanket and away they went.
It was a couple of hours later that she appeared quite composed but actually I sensed something had gone awry. She said “It seemed that Maggie wasn’t her composed self this year. Actually once we sat down in the cathedral she began shaking and trembling so violently, I took her out of the church and she spent the rest of the time sitting in a tree. Of course, she had a harness on and would be safe but I don’t know why she became so distressed.” I said, “I told you that over the past years she has become Jewish and cannot tolerate taking communion.” The N.L. said “Don’t be silly, it’s just a blessing.” “Yes”, I responded. “But Jews don’t take communion, it’s against our belief in many ways and Maggie identifies with me.”
We had a lovely lunch and my cat ran through her apartment, ate her food but obviously she was finished with St. Francis. So there it is, part two, since I got caught up in the communion last year and see what happened in the presidential race, I now feel confident that a democrats are going to be the victor this time around.
If even my cat identifies with Judaism, I know there is a power greater than me and has chosen to forgive me for my trespass of last year when I unexpectedly took "communion". I know I will be granted the joy of having a Democratic president. God bless us all.

P.S. Here it is the P.S. Here it is the end of 2007 and we’re stuck with the same bowlegged wannabe cowboy sitting in the Whitehouse. I don’t want to go into a rage at this time of the year and maybe if I make a New Year’s wish, I’ll have better luck with my so-called psychic powers. They have been failing me miserably and possibly a glass or two of champagne will be needed to revive my downhearted spirit vis-à-vis the presidential election.
However, Maggie the cat has taken this all in stride. I’ll just have to follow her example.